Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Heaven smells like bread

When I get in the mood to do something, I must do it.....dammit. So yesterday I was off from work, and I was sitting in the living room, catching up on The Tudors (oh hi hello Jonathan Rhys Myers). When I am home for any length of time, I feel the need to do something domestic. That morning was consumed with cleaning, and I did a good amount, but that afternoon, even though fixated on British sexiness on the TV, I wasn't in complete domestic bliss. I looked over at my clean kitchen, and decided it needed a thin film of flour covering, well, everything. It was just too clean. So I made bread.

I have a love hate relationship with making bread. Sometimes it comes out good, but mostly it is just ehhhhh....at least the house smells good. Well my two friends, the bread I made yesterday was smack yo momma on the fanny fantastic. I googled "very easy bread recipe" and was rewarded with this link.

I did exactly what the author said. I mixed and kneaded and let it rise for the exact amount of time specified. I punched it, rolled it out, and slapped it in the oven (boy I sound violent). I let it bake for precisely 30 minutes, and turned it out onto a rack to cool.

Y'all I think heaven must smell like baked bread, because that's what my house smelled like. As instructed, I let that loaf cool. I did not cut into it, even though I REALLY wanted to. Shortly after taking it out, dear Husband said "oh hi we're going out to dinner with the Smiths."

"Cool." I thought, since any night that I don't have to cook is good.

"They are treating." Dear husband said.

"Rawk." I thought, but then looked lovingly over at the bread. I went over to my creation and touched it. It was still warm, so I decided to leave it out whilst we dined.

I noticed throughout dinner that my hair smelled like bread. It's a sexier than Chanel y'all.

When we came back home it still smelled like bread. The loaf was cool, so I got out my bread knife, and cut. The bread kept its form, and the slices looked like real bread slices, like you might get at the store. My past attempts looked like mutants, so I was pretty stoked. I decided, since I usually don't eat the ends on store bought bread, that I would eat the ends of my creation that night, since they were super skinny.

OMG IT WAS SO FRIGGIN GOOD. The innards were soft, and the crust was buttery (since I brushed butter on before cooking) and flaky.

Friends, if you ever feel the need to bake bread, use the linked recipe. It is the bomb!

2 comments:

Jamie said...

I love making bread; I find it soothing, stress-relieving and sensual. Thanks so much for this link. I don't often try new bread recipes and rarely stray from the bread recipes that I am confortable with. This looks great! And congratulations on perfect bread!
And by the way, I think you are oh so cool!

wonderbitch said...

Thanks! I am certainly going to make more bread now that I have found this wonderful recipe.

I think I'm pretty cool and groovy. I picked not that cool for my blog because it is the title of a favorite song, and it just sounds fun!